February 22, 2012

How your kids can be financially successful when they grow up

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There is no way kids will self-learn financial management. And it is not something that it taught at school. It is the responsibility of their parents to teach them financial management. They need to put into practice financial management principles.

Lack of financial knowledge and management skills will make them grow up as people who live for the next pay-check. You would not want this kind of situation for your kids. Teaching them prudence at an early age will set them up for a rewarding future life devoid of financial misery.

How to teach kids financial discipline?

Remove their financial dependence on you

After a certain age, you should encourage your kids to save money. They should not depend on you always for their financials. Slowly start teaching them to reduce their dependency on you for money. When they grow into adolescents, they can start doing part-time work. This could make them financially independent.

You might say that financial independence is a two-edged sword. It may make your kid independent and financially wise. At the same time your kid could use the money to pursue useless things.

Discuss finance at home

You need to talk about financial issues over your dinner table. Let your kids learn about finances. Let them know how you repaid a loan, and how you raised one. Give them as much information about financial matters. It is true that ignorance is bliss. But financial ignorance is perilous.

Ask your kids to be involved in the conversation. Ask them to give suggestions. Get them to think financially.

Reserving Your Judgment of His Friends

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You hear the knock on the door and can’t help letting a gasp escape as you see the guys (or girls) coming to pick your teen up to hang out. You try not to stare, but it’s hard not to with the hair, the clothes, the accessories. No matter who greets you at the door, do the best you can to reserve judgment until you get more of a chance to know them. This doesn’t mean that you are going to just let your teen walk out the door. But before you react, take a step back.

Smile, invite them in and be friendly. Some of the outrageous fashion trends that teens are drawn to are just a ploy to get attention. When you don’t give in or make it a big deal out of it, you gain the upper hand.

You also let them know you aren’t planning to judge the book by its cover. If you are having a hard time with this, think back to some of the things that you may have worn and how people treated you. You may not have been the handsome, clean-cut guy with the Rocawear clothing and nice shoes. However, that doesn’t mean that you were anything bad.

Actions, beyond what they wear or what they look like, are a much better predictor of the type of person they are and how they behave. Take a deep breath and talk to them like you would any other adult. Listen for things like manners and intelligent conversation. This is a much better indicator of what is inside. Don’t jump to conclusions and regret it.

Is It Time For Your Daughter To Switch Doctors?

When your child hits her teen years, it is time to start considering her changing medical needs. If you daughter is still seeing the pediatrician she grew up with, it may be time to switch. As a girl begins puberty, both her physical and emotional needs transform. She may begin to have questions about her changing body that she wouldn’t be comfortable asking the same doctor that saw her for the banged up knees and chicken pox.

Talk to your daughter about switching to a new doctor who is familiar with treating girls her age. Find out if she would be more comfortable seeing a female—many young girls are. When it comes time for the appointment, see if she would like you to go back with her or stay in the waiting room. This is hard for many moms, but if your daughter has concerns that she is uncomfortable mentioning to you, at least she will receive honest feedback from a medical professional rather than being left with misconceptions.

Probably the hardest step of all is approaching the topic of birth control. While you may think there is no chance your daughter is even kissing boys, much less taking things further, birth control is certainly something to consider. If your daughter has particularly bad cramps, hormonal birth control can ease this for her. It can also help with heavy periods. This is something that you should discuss with the family doctor as well as your daughter. You can do this and still let it be known that you do not approve of any sexual contact at her age/until she is married/until she is fifty… whatever the case may be.

 

Teen Substance Abuse

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If you are concerned that your teen might be doing drugs, you need to take action. You are probably wondering how you can be sure that you instincts are correct. There are some warning signs to watch for in a teen who has started on a path of substance abuse.

-Your teen was once outgoing and friendly, but now seems moody and withdrawn.

-You notice that your daughter is suddenly hanging out with an entirely new crowd.

-Your child seems to want to sleep more often than usual and is hard to wake up in the morning.

-Your son, who once lived for football practice, now has a nonchalant attitude about his game skills.

-You notice that your teen’s eyes are red, or the pupils are dilated.

-You find evidence of drugs in his room.

-You notice that she is more apt to come home late without calling.

While none of these (with the exception of drug evidence) is a tell-tale sign that your teen is messing with drugs, they are certainly things you should be on the watch for. The next step is to help your teen. First, discuss your concerns. State the reasons why you feel that your teen may be doing drugs. Ask for a blunt answer while making a promise not to fly off the handle about the situation. If you teen admits to trying or regularly doing drugs, find out why they are using substances. Often stress or emotions will overwhelm a teen. Drugs are not the answer, but because a drug may help a teen feel relaxed, they are able to push the stress aside. Discuss other ways to do this including sports, yoga, swimming, meditation and changes in diet. For many, drugs are an “easy” way out—unfortunately, most teens don’t truly understand the consequences of what they are risking by abusing substances.

 

Rebellion Isn’t Misbehavior

Why is it that teenagers rebel? The teen years are a hard time for most kids. This is the stage where they feel as if they need to grow up, but they are not quite sure if they can handle the responsibility. Teens have harder classes, more homework, often a part-time job as wells as sports and other extra-curricular activities. They have pressure from friends to try new things—some good and some bad. Teens also have confliction emotions, often due to hormonal changes. They are prone to taking things out of context because they over think the situation. A simple suggestion from a parent is seen as a sharp insult. A low grade on a test is a direct hit to their self-esteem.

So, how can you help your child through these years? First of all, try to listen more often than you talk. Teens have a lot to say and oftentimes feel as if no one is listening. They have questions, thoughts and ideas that go unsaid because someone is too busy to hear them out, or because they are afraid that if they communicate their ideas, someone will brush them off. If a teen feels as if she is not heard, she may begin to act out. This is not quite the same as a child throwing a fit to get attention, but the underlying cause is similar.

Teens need to be encouraged to share thoughts and ideas. They often need help, but feel as if they are too old to ask. If your teen is struggling with something and beginning to act out, there are things you can do to help. If school is an issue, talk to your teen about having a student-parent meeting with her counselor. Teens are often just waiting for a parent to step in and take action because they are not sure which route to take.

 

Drugs and Alcohol – How to Approach Your Teen

Peer pressure 

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The teen years can be scary for parents—this is a time when peer pressure really kicks in. Friends get together and, no matter how “good” your kid is, often are talked into doing things they would typically never do. How can you help your teen say no to peer pressure? Lectures won’t work, yelling always backfires, and nagging will only urge your teen to rebel even more.

Talk to your teen on the level. Ask them what their friends are doing, but don’t be confrontational about it. Kids often find it easier to speak to their parents when they don’t have to be eye to eye. Bring up the conversation in the car, but be prepared to actually listen. If you interrupt—or even worse, blow up—then your teen is bound to shut up. That’s never a good thing. You want to keep the lines of communication open. Be prepared for his answers. Think before you respond.

If your teen’s friends are trying drugs or alcohol, talk to your child about it. Did he try it too? If not, has he considered it? What stopped him? If he has tried drugs or alcohol, a good approach is to go over your concerns in a neutral voice. If you freak out, he will too. State the reasons for your fear including the risk of health problems (or in severe cases, death). If your teen is into sports, bring up the fact that most schools have a no-tolerance policy. If he hasn’t tried the things his friends are doing, reinforce the fact that you are proud of his decisions.

Keep him talking and ask him to come to you if he is considering trying alcohol or drugs. Let him know that you will be there to speak frankly and calmly about the situations in his life, even if they concern matters that you don’t approve of. Some kids never try drugs or alcohol, but many do. Be ready to discuss your child’s choices openly and honestly.

 

Is Your Teenager Failing School?

As a parent, you want to make sure that your teen is getting the best education possible. High school years are the foundation for adult life. If your teen is struggling to thrive in school, the first step toward success is to find your teen’s learning style.

The three primary types of learning include:

  • Auditory – An auditory learner does best when he talks aloud to others about the lesson at hand, hears the problem and explanation read by a teacher, or reads the lesson out loud to himself.
  • Visual – A teen that takes many notes, does best when reading silently, and often has a hard time concentrating when there is noise or activity in the immediate area is a visual learner.
  • Kinesthetic – If your teen likes the hands-on approach to most lessons, he is likely a kinesthetic learner. This means he is often anxious sitting in a quiet classroom; he would much rather be in the chemistry lab or a cooking class physically manipulating the objects involved in a lesson.

Once you are able to recognize your teen’s learning style, you can help him put together a plan of action that will allow him to succeed in school. After speaking with your teen, you may want to schedule an appointment with the school counselor. She should be able to steer your teen toward classes that better meet his needs. If, however, your teen’s school does not have alternatives to his current class work, it may be better to look into alternative schooling methods.

One alternative schooling method includes homeschooling, which is great for any type of learner–particularly if your teen leans toward the kinesthetic approach. Visual learners would do well enrolled in an online school curriculum. The work would be in front of him at all times, enabling him to absorb the lesson without disruption. Online video instruction can work well for auditory learners, as can smaller classes where students work in groups (check with your regional education center regarding availability in your area).

 

Best Discipline Tips for Teens

You have a teen in your household, maybe two, and you are struggling with discipline. How do you get your son or daughter to come home on time? How do you get them to clean their room, or pick up after themselves?

Try these tips for better behavior:

  • Sit down with your teen and create a schedule together. Post the schedule in the kitchen where everyone can see the duties expected. The kitchen is a great gathering place, so your teen can’t complain that they didn’t know what was expected—especially if you tape the schedule to the fridge.
  • Have a consequence listed for failure to complete a particular assignment. For example, if you tell you’re teen that he or she must be home by 10 p.m. during the school week and he or she returns at 10:15, make sure that you talk over the problem. Yes, 15 minutes isn’t TOO late, but if your teen feels they can get away with 15 minutes, they will push for 30 the next time.
  • If your teen consistently has a problem with an area of expectation, re-work the schedule—find out what can be done differently to complete the task.
  • Give positive rewards for completion. A dinner out with dad; a trip to the nearest fishing hole.
  • Let your teen know of your love for them despite the disciple measure. Open the lines of communication by listening more than speaking.

Because your teen is more important than the “thing” he or she is not doing, it’s important to ask questions as well as listen. You may discover that you’re teen in reality “messed up” because they were unclear about how to do something you expected of them.

Keeping Your Child Safe Inside the Home

Statistics surround us each day, and in the increasingly digital world in which we live, numbers, averages, and facts can take on a rather impersonal feel. It’s one thing to hear that one in four women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetimes; it’s another thing entirely to think that your own child could be subject to this eventuality. But the harsh reality is that even at this very moment, your very young child could be being targeted by a predator with exceedingly harmful intentions, without your knowledge. Never before has access to the inside of a stranger’s home been so utterly simple as it is today. And that includes access to your child’s room, if there is a computer located there.

In the digital age, it’s a constant question: do parents limit their child’s access to computers in order to keep them out of chat rooms where they might fall prey to a predator? Or do they implement child monitoring tools on the computer in question, in order to help safeguard their child? Taking the first route of limiting access is akin to not allowing a child to read. This is harmful to their well being in life. The best route to take is to allow computer access, but to limit what your kids can get into.

Because after all, a child’s natural curiosity can lead them right into the waiting clutches of an Internet fiend. Many children have been successfully lured into trouble by someone who is attempting to molest them, and it happens right in their own home! PC Tools can give parents peace of mind by allowing them to monitor which areas of the web their child visits. In an age where sex offenders don’t stop at sexual abuse, but then proceed on to murder, it’s more necessary than ever before to use software in your child’s defense.

Best Driving Advice for Parents of Teens

Have a new driver within your household? Going crazy already? Take a look at these tips for smooth driving for both you and your new driver.

  • Borrowing the car should rarely be “on the spot or last minute” unless the need for the car is a “real” emergency. Driving privileges are just that, privileges, and should be treated as such. Your teen should let you know in advance when he or she will need the car and the times involved in such a loan. If you’re teen keeps their promise, then the next lend is available.
  • Allow your teen to make short grocery trips and other errands for you. This gives them driving experience and creates more time in your day to do other things.
  • If your teen has their own car, make sure you are still aware of where he or she is going. Cell phones are great, but getting a heads up before they leave the house will calm your nerves a bit.
  • Make some time to drive with your teen. You’ve probably had some pre-driver’s license experience, but keep in mind that becoming an expert at driving takes time and practice. Let your teen know when he or she makes a blunder, and how best to improve the mistake.
  • Keep calm when you are driving with your teen. Even if you’re heart is racing, speak as calmly as possible unless you are threatened with real and immediate danger.

In the long run, driving with a teen doesn’t have to be too traumatic or worrisome if you keep the lines of communication open and spend some time with your teen doing this “latest and greatest” new thing.